


You lose some, you win some

by polarRabbit



Category: Deadpool - All Media Types, Spider-Man - All Media Types
Genre: Alternate Universe - No Powers, M/M, Peter is into pet names and Wade's cloths, bartender!Peter, merc!Wade
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-10-07
Updated: 2018-10-07
Packaged: 2019-07-26 01:31:12
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,786
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16209851
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/polarRabbit/pseuds/polarRabbit
Summary: Paying a visit to Sister Margaret’s had become part of Wade’s weekly routine. Cash in the money for the jobs he got done and return part of it right back to the owner for a few drinks. He knew the rundown –despite Weasel claiming it to be vintage- shed better than his own flat. That’s why he immediately noticed any minimal changes. This time it wasn’t the jukebox messing up Shine On You Crazy Diamond but something around the height of 5’8.„Weasel.“, he was quick to flag down his friend to bring up his latest discovery. „Did you hire an underage prostitute to be your bartender?“





	You lose some, you win some

**Author's Note:**

  * For [Sabriel_4Ever](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Sabriel_4Ever/gifts).



> This fic is based on a prompt from Sabriel_4Ever, who wanted Peter to work as a bartender, catching Wade's attention with his (lack of) cloths.  
> I wanted to get the chance to introduce Peter as Weasel's cousin for a while because I rlly like the idea.

Paying a visit to Sister Margaret’s had become part of Wade’s weekly routine. Cash in the money for the jobs he got done and return part of it right back to the owner for a few drinks. He knew the rundown –despite Weasel claiming it to be vintage- shed better than his own flat. That’s why he immediately noticed any minimal changes. This time it wasn’t the jukebox messing up Shine On You Crazy Diamond but something around the height of 5’8.

„Weasel.“, he was quick to flag down his friend to bring up his latest discovery. „Did you hire an underage prostitute to be your bartender?“

„Whoever shit in your head this time should flush it, so maybe you can start making sense again.“

„I’m talking about the twink in those shorts that look like they’re painted on who’s handing out drinks.“, Wade decided to help him along by pointing not so subtly in the direction of the previously mentioned male.

„That’s just my cousin Peter. He’s old enough for the job and as long as he doesn’t have sticky fingers I don’t care what he’s wearing.“

„Says the one looking like he’d robbed a charity bin. No seriously how are the two of you related? No wait I can see it. He got all the sexiness and you’re left with whatever’s left of the limited gene pool.“

„Kiss my ass, Wilson.“

„No thanks, I’d rather eat your cousin’s.“ The comment earned him a disgusted expression from Weasel who took away the empty beer bottle in front of him.

„Excuse me while I’m looking for a paper bag to throw up into.“

„Take your time, I’m just gonna entertain myself…with your cousin in case I wasn’t clear about that.“

„I’m gonna piss into your beer.“, he heard Weasel threaten him before walking away to take care of another customer.

„Worth it!“, Wade called after him cheerfully, patiently waiting for the new bartender to return to the counter. Honestly he had his doubts Weasel would serve him anymore drinks tonight at all. It’d be definitely more effective than the cold shoulder treatment. This meant he had no other choice but to approach the newbie.

//

„Hey baby boy, got a minute for a thirsty customer?“ Wade decided to go blunt-flirty right away, knowing very well that it might earn him a negative reply but was willing to risk it. There’s no use to hide his God given charm, so why not use it to his advantage. 

„Sure, what can I get you, handsome?“, the brunet replied without missing a beat, giving Wade a smile that made his heart and dick swell at the same time. Peter had noticed the man talking to his cousin and despite the many noisy conversations going and had a feeling that he’d been the topic of this specific chat. He didn’t have a problem with that or the guy hitting on him right away. The other was definitely a couple of years older than him maybe in his early thirties if he had to guess, which was still a lot younger than the average client in this bar. He filled out his jacket really nice and had a pleasing face to look at as well. He didn’t look as dark and gloomy as most of the other mercs but Peter didn’t doubt that he had a weapon on him and was capable to get the job done.

„I’ll take anything you have to offer.“ Wade knew the drink menu by heart and tended to either order beer or shots. Today he’s open for a surprise.

„Oh really?“, Peter asked with a small grin while busying himself with drying off a beer jug. He liked to tease, and he enjoyed playing his little games. This guy seemed like a worthy opponent and Peter didn’t intend to go easy on him just because of a pretty bone structure.

„Hit me with your best shot.“

„You asked for it.“ Putting away the mug Peter grabbed a smaller glass instead. He turned away from the merc and used his body to block the sight of the ingredients he’s mixing together. A bottle of hot sauce briefly caught his attention but was left untouched in the shelf. The guy didn’t seem like someone who couldn’t handle some spice. Finishing with a dollop of whipped cream on top Peter placed down the red-brownish colored drink in front of the blonde.

„There you go, champ. No spitting.“, he reminded the mercenary with a teasing grin and an expectant look.

„I’ll let you know that I never waste a single drop.“, Wade stated before bringing the glass to his lips and swallowing the first gulp, keeping constant eye contact with the bartender. He’d downed a lot of shitty drinks in his life but this one definitely made it into the Top 3. It had a biting bitterness mixed with some rotten sweetness that didn’t exactly balance each other out. The whipped cream on top barely helped to neutralize it and only added to the questionable texture. The things one would endure for the chance to get laid. Wade managed to empty the whole glass without stopping once, despite feeling like he was going to throw up during the process. 

„Delicious.“, he claimed, emphasizing his statement by swiping his tongue over his bottom lip. Actually he could taste the bile rise in his throat. It would be just his luck to throw up in front of the only cute bartender that ever grazed this shed with his presence.

„That’s dish soap with cheap gin and old strawberries…I really didn’t think you’d take more than a sip.“, Peter told him in bewilderment but then had to laugh when the man’s poker face finally shattered, and he grabbed for the bottle closest to him to rinse the bad taste out of his mouth.

„You tried to poison me, so now you owe me!“

„Well I didn’t succeed. How about a game of pool? If you win I’ll let you straw feed me your milkshake but if I win then you have to give me your jacket.“

„What, no sexual favors in return? You’re missing out on something, sweet cheeks.“

„Pretty sure I could get those favors anytime.“

„It hasn’t even been an hour yet but you know me so well already.“

„I take it you agree?“

„Dunno that jacket has some sort of sentimental value, it’s basically irreplaceable and perfectly worn in. What if your bj’s aren’t that superb?“ Wade obviously just tried to get a reaction out of the younger one. It was only fair considering that Peter made him have way too many reactions of his own to be healthy.

Peter seemed to ponder for a bit, then started rummaging through the fridge where he’d seen a jar of cocktail cherries. Freeing one of the bright red fruits out of the container he plopped it into his mouth, including the stem. He was quick to chew and swallow the cherry while keeping the not that tasty part in his mouth, moving it around and probably making some stupid faces in the process. Considering that the man he’s trying to impress hadn’t started laughing yet and simply stared at him Peter thought he didn’t do such a bad job.

Opening his mouth a minute or two Peter stuck out his tongue at the merc, presenting the cherry’s stem, tied into a small knot. He hadn’t just caught the man’s attention with his little trick but simply ignored the other mercs staring at him. Done with his performance the brunet spit the stem into the trash can. The taste of sugar and artificial cherry flavor was overwhelming. Since Wade’s brain apparently still needed a few seconds to reboot Peter drank a mouthful of his ginger ale on the rocks.

„…ready whenever you are.“

„Hey Wes, I’m gonna take a short break!“, he let his cousin know before leaving his spot behind the bar.

„No quickies in the toilet or you’re gonna clean it with your toothbrush!“

„Don’t worry I wouldn’t enter that hepatitis trap if you’d pay me for it.“

//

Wade didn’t know if Peter was aware of his mad pool skillz. If he’s just stalling to rile him up even more than he already was. Even if Peter were the current international pool champion he didn’t stand chance because Wade had a goal and there’s no one stopping him from bringing this guy to his yard.

Like the gentleman he sometimes liked to pretend he was Wade let Peter have the honor of opening the game. The merc ended up with the striped balls. From observing the bartender’s moves he could tell that this wasn’t his first game, but he didn’t appear to be above mediocre. After pocketing one colored ball it was Wade’s turn. He managed to get three in and felt pretty confident of his chances of success. That was until the brunet started cheating.

Wade had been busy appreciating the arch of his back and the curve of his ass whenever it was Peter’s turn, and he bent forward, closer to the green table. His grip around the cue he’s holding tightened involuntarily. Wade’s inner perverted child wanted to give the firm flesh beside him a little slap but the grown-up, considerate part told him that it wasn’t appropriate. 

Another colored ball landed in the right pocket but Wade was still leading and thanks to the other’s shot he was in the perfect position to get in the green striped one. He’s fixing the ball with his eyes thinking about the best angle when his attention got diverted by Peter standing on the other side of the table. His hand were wrapped around the cue, similar to how Wade’s had been before with the difference that Peter did less clutching and more languid moving. His fingers slid up and down the shiny, wooden surface making Wade’s throat feel very dry all of a sudden.

„That’s really low, sugar.“, he complained halfheartedly, trying to avert his focus from those slim fingers that would certainly feel amazing curled around a very interested part of him back to the table. It was the first of many moves that led to Wade missing several shots, having to watch Peter catching up and finally win the game. The merc couldn’t even be mad because the show he’d gotten during the match was spank bank worthy.

Nevertheless, he had to part with his favorite jacket. Helping Peter slip his arms into his prize he had to admit that it suited him, despite being a few sizes too big. The sleeves didn’t stop around his wrists, brushing his knuckles instead. 

„It’s super cozy. Thanks for warming it up for me.“, the brunet commented with a pleased smile. 

Wade froze his ass off on his way home that night but it didn’t prevent him from looking forward to the next time he’d pay Sister Margaret a visit.

//

Peter wore Wade’s red jacket like a damn trophy, parading it around in front of him like a proud peacock. All while wearing the skimpiest leather shorts the merc had ever seen. He felt like three seconds away from humping the bar stool he’s currently sitting on. This wasn’t sexual tension anymore, no he’s long past that stage. The rubber had ripped, hit him in the face and left him 50 shades of blue balled. Someone should tell the minx that he could easily earn at least 200 hundred bucks more each night if he’d work at the establishment down the street with the pink neon lights. Since Wade wanted Peter to stay exactly where he was tho he didn’t mention it.

„Wanna play another game?“, Peter suggested while sliding a bottle into Wade’s already waiting hand.

„Now you just sound like my favorite horror movie puppet.“

„Sweet. Anyway I like your shirt, think it’d make a great crop top.“ Now Wade had noticed the bartender eyeing his chest, assuming it was because of the way it highlighted his pecs. Apparently the real reason had been the print on it or that’s what Peter wanted him to believe. The print was pretty faded and not that good looking anymore.

„What’s it with you and your obsession for my cloths?“

„It’s not my fault the suit me so well.“

„You know what would really suit you? Me on top of you or underneath, I’m flexible.“

„Let’s make it part of the stake.“

„You’re on, peach pie.“

This time they played dart. Another game Wade had a fair amount of experience with. Peter used the same tricks he’d come up with during their round of pool, which meant Wade should theoretically be immune to it. Practically he managed to get one dart stuck in some other merc’s arm. It almost ended in a fight if it weren’t for Peter taking the blame and getting the guy a free drink. There’s no use to continue the game afterwards. Wade knew he couldn’t win and pulled off his shirt, holding it out for the bartender to take. At least he’d been smart enough not to bet his biker jacket.

//

Upon leaving the bar Wade noticed a figure standing in the shadows right next to his ride. Thanks to the shitty lightning it took him a moment to recognize the familiar brunet. „Waiting for someone?“, he wanted to know, coming to a halt in front of the young man.

„I like your bike.“, came the casual reply, followed by Peter resting his hand on the saddle.

„I’ve learned my lesson. Ain’t gonna bet my precious lady.“

„Nah, you can keep her but maybe…take me for a ride?“

„Where do you want me to drop you?“ Wade wasn’t in a bad mood despite his losses and didn’t mind giving the other a ride home. Not even having a helmet himself the merc couldn’t offer one to Peter either. The other didn’t protest, sliding onto the seat behind him. Wade felt his arms wrapping themselves snugly around his middle and the light pressure of Peter’s chest against his back.

„What’s your address?“ The counter question was spoken against Wade’s neck with a brush of lips that send a tingling sensation down his spine. Starting the engine Wade was quick to maneuver them out of the narrow alleyway.

„Guess I know the way.“

//

Wade didn’t get his dick tied up in a neat bow –thank you very much- but aside from that he got everything he’d wished for and then some more. Peter did sinful things ™ with his tongue that were probably illegal in most states and made the merc curse in language he’d never spoken before. To his neighbors it must’ve sounded like an exorcism going on next door.

„You must have been a vacuum in your previous life.“

„And you certainly were a poet.“, Peter replied with a snort, taking a swig from the water bottle he’d been offered. Wades eyes were still fixed on the brunet’s reddened and slightly puffy lips. He wanted to kiss them until Peter’s lips were too sensitive to handle the pressure any longer, which was kinda strange because usually Wade wasn’t that obsessed with kissing people he barely knew. Sure it was a pleasant sensation, but so was feeling the drag of nails and teeth against his skin. 

„Hey, everything alright? You’re looking kinda out of it. Did I accidentally liquefied your brain and sucked it out?“, his train of thoughts was derailed by Peter’s voice reaching his brain with a bit of delay.

„If anyone can do that it would be you, pumpkin.“, he joked, making some space for him on the couch to sit down. The cushion beside him dipped slightly when Peter took a seat beside him, putting down the half emptied water bottle on top of the messy coffee table.

„I like how you always come up with new nicknames. Though I think I have a favorite one.“ 

„Hmm lemme guess…“ Wrapping his arm around the smaller guy’s shoulder Wade pulled him closer against his side. „Baby boy.“, he whispered lowly, letting his warm breath tickle the shell of Peter’s ear. „It’s my favorite one as well.“, he admitted before taking the earlobe between his teeth, giving it a light tug. „Wanna stay the night?“

„Depends…would the morning after be awkward?“

„Only if you aren’t into breakfast nachos.“

„I’m in.“

„Wish that was me.“

„Who’s stopping you?“

„Oh baby boy, you’re gonna be the death of me.“, Wade remarked dreamily, effectively silencing both of them by pressing their lips together in another heated kiss. The sun was about to rise, and they still had a lot of calories to burn until breakfast.


End file.
